Less ego, more love and understanding to make marriage work - Penang Mufti

SHAH ALAM – Boiling with anger and frustration, determined to prove your partner that you are right and they are in the wrong? Take a deep breath and reconsider your stand on things. Is it worth worth waging war today? Maybe not, according to the Penang Mufti.

Datuk Seri Dr Wan Salim Wan Mohd Noor said married couples were advised to lower their ego for a harmonious matrimonial relationship.

He said both parties should make the efforts to understand each other as the first step to a good and healthy union.

"In short, if there is an understanding and true love between both parties, hence then the rights and obligations of the husband and wife will only be a matter of formality," he said.

Wan Salim had previously said that that domestic violence should not happen as Islam wanted the relationship between a husband and wife to be built on warmth and love; Allah SWT also created spouses among ourselves so that we may find comfort in them (Surah Ar-Rum, 30: 21).

His comments came following a report which revealed that Selangor recorded the highest number of domestic violence cases in the country over the past three years, with a staggering 813 cases reported between January and August this year.

He had also pointed out that if a wife can no longer continue living with her husband who oppressed her, then she is required to demand the dissolution of the marriage by way of khulu' or redemption of talaq in the Syariah court.

When asked whether, generally, a woman should be financially independent for them to be able to have the confidence to leave an abusive marriage, Wan Salim agreed but said that being financially-abled should not be the main reason for the woman to leave her husband.

"The wife should not simply ask for a divorce or be arrogant to her husband just because she has her own source of income," he said.

It takes two to make a relationship to work, he said, and mutual understanding on top of love way key.